MEETING YOUR PARTS
The primary focus in IFS is on enabling the client to find and meet the ‘parts’ (or ‘sub-personalities’) which underlie their issues and bedevil their attempts to solve them by more conventional methods. The astonishing thing is that these ‘parts’ are like separate intelligences. They have their own personalities, their own convictions, and their own ways of looking at the world. Their ideas as to what’s good for us are often quite different from our own. Guided by the therapist, nearly everyone finds that they can access these parts with ease. It’s possible to do it on your own, once you are trained, but not so easy. Some people experience the 'parts' as subtle feelings in or around the body, others get them as images.
Inner Critic parts. by the way, tend to manifest as internal voices. I’m not talking about hallucinations, more about an inner sensing. They tend to say things like: ‘You’re not good enough!’, ‘You always get things wrong!’, ‘You’re not lovable!’ etc. We all have at least one of these internal voices, to a greater or lesser extent, and for some people, they ruin our lives.
ALL 'PARTS' ARE WELCOMEOne of IFS’s most important insights is that all of our ‘parts’, even those that are actually sabotaging or hindering our best intentions, genuinely believe that they are working for our beneficial good. The problem is that the individual parts don’t have the full picture and therefore misunderstand what is truly for our benefit and what isn’t. However knowing that they want to work for our good is what gives us the hope and opportunity to bring about change. And one of IFS’s most important principles is: ‘All parts are welcome!’ By this we recognise that you don’t get ‘parts’ to change by fighting them, only by getting to know them and understanding where they are coming from.